Planning for Change

In November we take time for remembering. We recall the hard won freedom of our country and tuck the fields in for their winter's solitude. I encourage you to take time to reflect on the life lessons of the past farming season. Be courageous.

Are there things you need to hold on to, let go of, take on, or move on ?

This process is not just a memory jolt. Taking a hard look at the changes you've experienced this past year will give you a clear idea of where you might be headed. Someone once said "Change is inevitable, growth is optional!"

Hold On:

What things are you doing that you want to continue doing? If farming is your passion and you want to hold on to the farm business, what does that look like to you? Describe what a really great day on the farm would look like. Can you express your desires to your mate? The business is one aspect of your life, but what family activities are a high priority for you now? The support of family and friends can help you survive the storms of farm life. Studies have shown rural women withstand the stress of low income and long hours of work provided that they have a supportive spousal relationship. How well are you holding on to each other?

Let Go:

Sometimes we need to conduct minor surgery on our lives and fix what hasn't been working. This might mean being really honest about what our addictions have been costing our family and business. Are you addicted to work, food, booze? Do you care too much about others at the expense of your own well being? If you are feeling stuck in your current situation, you might want to create an exit plan. Transitioning out of your current work role at the farm may mean working different hours or only working when you choose to come and help out. The whole process of letting go is difficult. The BSE fiasco has shown us what a lack of control of markets can do to devastate an industry. Can you let go of the things that are out of your control, and focus on what you can change?

Take On:

I'm a firm believer in life-long learning. I want to take on projects that will help me be a better person, relate to others, and help our family and farm business. The farming lifestyle can be fulfilling when you feel what you are doing is meaningful. What things would be good for you to take on this winter? Are there some new skills you need to learn? Is it time to face your mortality and work on a plan to transfer the farm? Is it time to have more fun and find out where the old-time dances are scheduled? Is it time to learn how to work the wood lathe, and dust off the books waiting to be savoured?

Move On:

What season of life are you in? The 40's have different challenges than the fifties, sixties and beyond. You may not want to "act your age", but ask yourself what challenges you expect to meet at your stage in life. Forty-year olds want to take charge. The fifty crew focuses on the quality of their living, and lightens the stuff they carry along. (Which is why de-cluttering is such a hot topic for this group). Age 65 is not a marker of being old, but when the brown envelope is a regular item in the mailbox, it begs to ask "What does "starting over" mean to you? Some people choose not to retire. Those farmers over 70 may want to move on with mentoring the next generation and leaving a legacy.

Love the age you are!

Life is a grand adventure, more like a "Slinky" and not a straight line.

Perhaps you just want to get on with your life, and not change very much. The years slip quickly by, and so may some of your dreams if you don't stop to remember who you want to be and what you want to do.

I'm a human being first, wanting to be intentional about caring for myself, my family, and my community. Character really counts.

Planning for change may sound impossible, but dig down and figure out how you want to restructure the current scenario you find yourself in.

Farm families are resilient and have many resources to draw on. You can choose to cruise through the winter doing things the way you've always done, or you can look at your situation with courage and say "Some things around here have to change."

Planning for change involves:

Holding on to what is good and right for you.
Letting go of the habits, activities, and roles that don't work for you anymore.
Taking on new learning projects, and unlearning things that keep you stuck.
Moving on with a timeline to accomplish what your life stage requires of you.

Farmers are famous for living in "next year country". My challenge to you is to learn from the past year's trials. Take good care of yourself and your family, …physically, emotionally and spiritually. Find a quiet place to contemplate what you want to hold on to, what needs to be let go of, and new things to take on. Then move on …ready for the next challenge.

Elaine Froese is a Certified Professional Coach and speaker. She helps farm families talk , identify their issues,and make new plans for their future. Call 1-866-848-8311 toll free or email: elaine@elainefroese.com

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